Money

so i spent part of today filling out paperwork for my pension plan with world harvest. it's something that i've struggled with on several levels. first, i've heard all the stuff about being responsible with our money, planning for the future, making sure we take care of our families, being good stewards, etc. but it still gnaws at me: "why do i need a pension?" i feel like i'm just saving for the sake of saving. building up more wealth for the sake of building it up. the second reason i struggle with it is because i LOVE money. i like to think about it. i like to look at account balances because there's something alluring there. i felt the desire to be served by money sinking its hooks into my heart - beginning to force me to serve it instead. that's the way it always is with the things our hearts love. we think they will serve us, but in the end, we serve them. we think they'll bring life, but instead they suck it from us.
so, i finish the day feeling like a little life has been sucked out of me, right onto the page where i made my pension allocation instructions.